Is that thing connected?

What happened to me? Sometimes I am posing this question in response to a distinctly mommish thing I yell at my kids. Things I never thought I would think, let alone say. Like when a pumpkin got smashed on the front porch and I yelled something about damn teenagers. Sometimes it is when I pass a picture of the 24 year old me, I wonder what in God's green earth happened to that fab mane of hair. I mean seriously, my hair will never get that gloriously long or gorgeous again. What the hell happened to ME!? I used to be WILD! The other day I started making a mental list of things that have aged me: kids, stress, life altering health diagnoses, 3 out of state moves, etc. Wow, my list was long and tough and overwhelming. No wonder I'm not ME anymore! 

Oh, but I forgot a big one on that list though...time. I guess even if that list of tricky things that aged me didn't exist, time still would. I still would be 10 years older today, no matter what. I started feeling a little better. We are all 10 years older than 10 years ago. I am feeling better about this thing already. So I go in the bathroom, the one with the good lighting, the one with the 8 light bulbs across the top of the mirror. Of course I HAD to lean in close to the mirror to investigate my not-so-bad-self. To my horror I see a 3 inch blonde hair by my neck area, just chillin'. I know it can't be connected, it must be one of the kids baby hairs. Is that thing connected? YES, yes it is. The "ten years ago Sandy" did not have things such as this, nor did she realize she ever would.

the young and rested us

But I tell you what, I wouldn't trade all the money and shiny locks in the world to go back. I will take this life, killer blonde neck hairs and all. The most beautiful things have happened to me these past 10 years, I got to marry my favorite person in the whole world, and he still loves me back. Neck hairs and all. I have a daughter and a son; I feel like the most blessed woman ever. I plucked that flowing blonde neck beauty, and it gave me hope that I can still grow long beautiful hair on top of my head, if I so choose! Whoop, whoop!

I would like to think of myself as an adult, even though it is still funny to me most days. How can I possibly be entrusted to do such adult things? I don't know, but it is a gift. I learn something new each new year, each new day, that I am gifted. I am grasping at the opportunities each day I am given: to try new things, meet new friends, to show His love in small ways, to learn from others that may be just a bit adultier than me.  

at least I'm not donning mom jeans just yet

I am still the same girl that God made me: wild, a little stubborn, loving, creative, heart on my sleeve type gal. I will embrace that wrinkle, that gray hair, those lovely lavender eye bags. These signs of growing more mature are a reason for thanks. Thank you, God, for more days than I have deserved.

Hold Tight

My sweet 7 year old daughter heard about the shootings in California on the radio. We have always been able to protect and shelter her from these news stories, and this time we couldn’t. She was confused and scared and didn’t understand why something like that would happen. The more I tried to discuss it with her, the more my emotions mirrored hers. I don’t get it either, Grace, I really don’t. I never thought I would have to address such heartbreaking chaos with my innocent children. It scares me. I want to tell them something more than it will be ok.

  

I don’t want to teach my kids to be afraid of everything. I want to teach my kids to laugh, to be adventurous and kind. I want them to see how much good there is in this big, big world. I want to give them hope that this world isn’t doomed. How do I comfort her when I get scared myself? I tell her the truth; I get scared and worried too. I am teaching her that we will stand on the PROMISES. God makes a lot of promises in the bible, a LOT. One of the most frequently mentioned promises is that we are to not be afraid. How can we not be afraid, though, with all that is going on? I can let the evil around me consume my thoughts with worry and fear, or I can search and pray for peace and hope in the chaos, through scripture. God tells us that only He can give a peace not of this world. I put together a list of my go-to verses to share with my Gracie girl, as I visit them often when life gets too scary to figure out on my own.

Peace is what I leave with you; it is my own peace that I give you. I do not give it as the world does. Do not be worried and upset; do not be afraid. John 14:27

Do not be anxious about anything, but in every situation, by prayer and petition, with thanksgiving, present your requests to God. Philippians 4:6

This is my command--be strong and courageous! Do not be afraid or discouraged. For the LORD your God is with you wherever you go. Joshua 1:9

So do not fear, for I am with you; do not be dismayed, for I am your God. I will strengthen you and help you; I will uphold you with my righteous right hand.  Isaiah 41:10 

A Psalm of David.The LORD is my light and my salvation-- whom shall I fear? The LORD is the stronghold of my life-- of whom shall I be afraid? Psalm 27:1

 I have told you these things, so that in me you may have peace. In this world you will have trouble. But take heart! I have overcome the world. John 16:33 

God doesn’t say there may be trouble. He promises there will be trouble. How is this comforting? Despite these overwhelming troubles, He has overcome the world. The entire world!  He knows our story from beginning to end, even if that story isn’t pretty; he comforts us with His peace and His promise of eternal life. God doesn’t promise if I follow him that things will be perfect, or this place will be flawless. He does promise that once we accept Jesus as our Savior, we have eternal life with Him. We are saved.  He has overcome the world, this beautiful, scary, possibility-filled world. He gives us hope. I choose to focus on His truth and pray on His promises when everything else seems uncertain. I want to snuggle my kids into a warm blanket and protect them from the rest of the world. I imagine that is what Christ is doing for all of us, His children, with His word.  He will cover us like a blanket of peace, our great protector. He is our steadfast comforter, when nothing else can shield us. Hold tight. He is our truth, our salvation, our promise and our light.

Send out your light and your truth; let them lead me; let them bring me to your holy hill and to your dwelling!  Psalm 43:3